How I Learned To Be Happy On My Own

This whole process of claiming happiness was a voyage of self-discovery. Looking back on the entire journey, I would not have it any other way.

I overcame fears, doubt, self-loathing, and even unhealthy patterns to find peace…..well, most of the time. It ain’t all sunshine and roses, but I learned to embrace happiness on my own.

1. I seek out relationships that “feel good”

We all do this — we find ourselves in unhealthy situations with toxic people that drain our time, energy, and resources. Why do we keep doing this year after year? Maybe you grew up that way, or maybe that was modeled to you as a child. Regardless of the reason, it’s time to break the bad relationship pattern and start noticing who supports you, who lifts you up and makes you feel good.

Don’t forget the most important relationship of all —that relationship with yourself. The more you can find peace within yourself, the more you will be able to decide who authentically fits in your life —and who needs to go.

2. I define my values and live by them

What I find true, fair, and of value are those things that I live by. I engage in relationships, activities, and passions that all fit with my highest ideals. In this way, no area of my life is in conflict with another. Furthermore, I honor my value system and beliefs with who I am and what I am doing with my life.

3. I notice the good

There is plenty of “bad” out there; one has only to turn on the evening news or read the daily newspaper to see that the world is chaotic and unpredictable. It is very easy to get bogged down with all of this negative information and become overwhelmed, frustrated, and angry at our state of affairs.

I have found that the more I focus on gratitude, the happier I am as I go about my daily activities. Even something as simple as a delicious cup of coffee can be a catalyst for a day of gratitude. The magic of gratitude is that it compounds upon itself —the more I notice little things in my life to appreciate, the more “good” comes my way.

4. I hold a vision of the best

Rather than looking at “what is” and being stuck in my present reality, I hold a higher vision of better things to come. I imagine a better job, a better home, a better car, better relationships. Then, I work on my feeling of being deserving of the best.

In doing so, I am becoming the kind of person that manifests my highest ideals and my greatest vision.

5. I do what I love

Sure, there are chores that must be done, and bills that must be paid. But once the minutia of life is out of the way, I DO WHAT I LOVE.

I am working toward living my passion, my purpose, and my vision. All these make me excited about life. I surround myself with work, people, and pursuits that I love, and life becomes a magical ride of pancakes and pleasures all day long.

6. I listen to my heart

Whenever I have gone against my morals, principles, and values, I haven’t been true to myself. Furthermore, I found myself in some pretty painful situations. These life lessons have taught me to listen to my heart about all decisions. The more I can be true to my feelings and live authentically, the more that my reality aligns with what truly resonates with me.

It has been a little bit of emotional and spiritual work to get to the point where I know my heart’s “voice,” but it has been well worth the effort. Ask your heart to speak to you, and it will never lead you astray.

7. I realize that life is ever changing

We tend to make ourselves miserable in life because we have unrealistic expectations and ideals as to how it should turn out. Other times, we want conditions, people, and situations in our lives to stay the same.

Life is ever-evolving and ever-changing. The more we can get out of the way and roll with the punches while looking for the good in all, the more we will be able to find happiness in all experiences, no matter what life has in store for us.

8. I love myself

Learning to love oneself is a courageous act; we must constantly cross-examine our thoughts, feelings, emotions, actions, and choices. We must be willing to accept ourselves just as we are, faults and all, while we seek to improve every aspect of ourselves.

It’s essential to practice self-care, set boundaries, and refuse to let anyone or anything get in the way of our joy and happiness. We must extend this love to others because that is how we become truly fulfilled in life.

I am not done with this process, but I am incredibly grateful and humbled to be on a path to greater love every day.

Joy in the midst of “life”

“Finding” happiness is not a destination. It is a daily choice to be joyful and to see things around us that inspire us to live in that state of gratitude and happiness.

Despite all of the world’s chaos right now, it is possible to be happy. Dig into yourself, get to know who you truly are and what is truly important to you. You’ll be on a magical journey of discovery that brings you more joy and peace every day!